Havelock, NC in about 1985….. we moved here with high hopes. I was excited to meet an uncle and his family I had only heard. There was a small trailer we rented that had a small bed and bath down one side and a larger bedroom and bathroom to the other end. I was grateful to have my own room even though there were places around the windows that were bare and I could see outside. I just stuffed some old newspapers into the cracks, filled the holes and tried to make it cozy.
Before we started to school my brother and I were allowed to get two pairs of jeans and two shirts because the only things we had were road worn from hitch hiking and had rips and stains that couldn’t be cleaned or repaired. So every night I would take a shower and let the water fill in the tub to wash my clothes, especially undergarments. The kids accused me of wearing my pants every day but they were the same make of jeans and I just washed them at night and alternated them every other day.
The moss colored tub was shallow but it got the job done. One day as I was getting out of my shower, I grabbed my towel to wrap around me when he lunged at me and took my towel. I fought for it and then coward towards the corner to cover myself. “I yelled at you to get out of the shower and stop wasting water, you don’t give a damn” he yelled as he pulled at me grabbing handfuls of my breasts and then pushed me across the room were ai huddled with my arms crossing over my flesh. “I will not be ignored in my own home” his eyes were roaming my body. I cried out for him to stop, to forgive me for not hearing him. But he had gone too far, he needed to punish me for not listening, he needed to violate but feel righteous because he needed to feel that I’m deserving.
Raising Vipi 